15 Things I’ve Learned About Life in the Last 36 Years in 2020

15 Things I’ve Learned About Life in the Last 36 Years

 

 Hello hello! Welcome back to The Healthy Lifestyle. 

So it's been a rather long time since I've posted. Its because I had some family obligations to attend to, but those are over now and I'm back. 

I recently celebrated my 36th birthday and I usually introspect on my birthdays, so I started thinking about the 15 things that I've learned in 36years

I'm going to share those items with you today.

1: if you're overwhelmed, break down your problems into smaller chunks. 


This is life advice that I think can apply to everything -whether it's a personal goal or a personal problem or a work issue. 

If you're overwhelmed with something the best thing you can do is break it down into smaller manageable chunks. 

As an example... let's say you're trying to lose50 pounds. 

That can sound like a very big number and it can seem very daunting and sometimes it's just hard to even get started because you have that big number to worry about. 

Don't do that. Break it down. 

Think about the first 5pounds that you have to lose. 

Then think about the next 5 pounds. Just break it down so it's a lot more manageable and it's gonna be a lot easier to work towards that goal. 

2: there is no straight path to success. 


When I was younger I used to have this naive notion that success was about a linear path...getting from point A to point B and that's really not the case. 

Success is not linear..so many hardships, so many failures along the way.

Sometimes it's two steps forward and three steps back. It's not a linear process. 

it takes time... it's difficult... it's hard... it's full of chaos and that's okay. That's the way it is so if you're working toward something and you're struggling and you feel like success is elusive, don't worry. 

Every little bit of failure gets you closer to success. It's not a straight path... you are still on the path. It's just not going to be straight. 

3: worrying is a waste of time. 


I'm someone who tends to worry a lot and I still do. I've reduced it quite a bit but I still do worry quite a bit but what I realized is that worrying is not a very productive activity. 

Worrying does not change anything. 

Worrying does not help you get closer to a solution and a lot of the times the things that we worry about don't even happen. 

So what's the point of worrying? Just try not to worry so much. 

4: you can't change anyone who doesn't want to change themselves. 


A lot of times in life when we start something positive or healthy we want to share it with our loved ones. 

We want them to change with us but the problem is if they're not actually ready for a change.. no amount of you trying to change them is actually going to work.

People only change when they're ready to change. I can educate people.

I can guide people, but if someone's not ready to change, I can force change on them. You have to let people on their own path. Everyone has their own journey - you need to let people follow their own journey.

5: experimenting and making mistakes is one of the best ways to learn. 


Many people shy away from experimenting and trying new things because it inherently involves mistakes and failure. 

As an example - cooking. Many people shy away from experimenting with their cooking style because they don want to fail - they don't want to make mistakes.

But let me tell you... I learned pretty much all of my cooking through experimenting. I used to watch FoodNetwork and then try things in the kitchen. 

Some things turned out well.. somethings were a disaster, but I learned from every single one of those disasters. 

So sometimes you just have to experiment and try new things and that's a really great way for you to learn something new. 

6: go with your gut feeling more often. 


I'm someone who tends to overanalyze everything and I don't really go by a gut feeling that often and I dismiss it and I've realized that I've made a couple bad decisions because of that. 

Sometimes you just have to rely on your gut feeling and every time I actually relied on gut feeling and paired it with logic ...I've made great decisions. 

So I do think dismissing gut feelings is not a good idea. 

At least listen to them... hear them out and see where it goes. 

7: books can truly expand your horizons. 


I used to be someone who loved reading as a kid. 

I would be at the library all the time and then the university happened.

Engineering happened. I had no time for reading anything other than textbooks, so throughout my twenties, I didn't really read much. 

I rekindled my love of reading in my early 30s and I have to say it's truly expanded my horizons. 

I have gathered new perspectives on things and I think it's such a good way to learn. 

8: not all friendships are meant to last and that's okay - don't be sad about it.


In my teens and my early twenties, I had this naive notion that my friendships should last a very, very long time. 

I loved my friends. I loved hanging out with them. 

I learned so much from them and it saddened me when those friendships faded away or you know we outgrew each other, but here's the thing..it's just part of life. 

Don't be sad when a friendship fades away. 

You'll find new friends. It's a process... we change a lot in our twenties and also our thirties and beyond. 

We continue to evolve in life so we're going to evolve in terms of our friendships too and that's okay. 

It's just something you have to accept and there's nothing to be sad about. 

9: rest is just as important as work. 


I think a lot of us know this but it didn't really hit home for me until I read this book and I've realized that I was not getting enough adequate rest. 

I do think self-care is important and I do a lot of self-care but rest is a little bit different. 

It can encompass different things. It's where you're not thinking about work at all. 

I noticed that sometimes I was doing self-care...for example if I was having a bath I would be thinking about YouTube. That was not rested. 

Rest is when you are not thinking about work at all. 

You're fully in the present moment and I think I need to do that more often because if you don't get enough rest, you can end up burning out and that's not a good feeling. 

So definitely try to incorporate rest with your work. 

It's important to have a balance. 


10: growth happens outside your comfort zone. 


If I look back at my life and think about the timesI've grown the most it's been the most uncomfortable time.

 As an example, I came to Canada in 2002. I was 19 and I had no friends, no family... I had no idea what I was doing. 

I had led a very sheltered life before that. 

So for me to come to a new country on my own was scary and somehow I managed and I learned so much from the experience. 

It was highly uncomfortable but I still learned a lot and I'm very grateful that I had that experience. So definitely try to push yourself a little bit outside your comfort zone. I tend to do that in some ways but in some areas of my life, I really don't do it enough. As an example -public speaking. 

I will not do it it is so far outside my comfort zone... if I get people asking me to do public speaking events my answer is always no- I'm not going to do it. 

I think I need to listen to my own advice ...that growth happens outside my comfort zone and applies it. 

So maybe in the next two years, I will do something outside my comfort zone. 

11:don't let stereotypes prevent you from trying new experiences. 


I think this is best explained with an example. 

When I was younger I used to think that cats were evil, horrible, selfish creatures, and I feel bad even saying this right now because they totally are not, but I used to believe that. 

I had these stereotypes in my head and I used to believe them and I didn't want to be around cats and I was not open to the idea of ever getting a cat. 

It wasn't until my 20s when I started to open up my mind and tried to let go of the stereotypes ( thanks to a friend)... I realized how wrong I was and now I have two cats. I am converted. 

I used to be a dog lover and now I'm a cat lover. 

Had I not opened up my mind.. had I not tried new things.

I don't think I would have had the experience that I had which I'm very grateful for. 

I love my kitties to death. 

12: there is no one-size-fits-all approach to healthy eating. 


Have you ever wondered why some people thrive on a particular diet and other people do not? It's because there is no perfect diet that fits everybody. 

We're all so different we're all biochemical individuals. 

We have different genetics, we have different lifestyles, we have different physical needs based off of our physical activities, we have different allergies. There are so many differences that it's impossible for there to be one perfect diet that's going to fit for everybody and that is exactly why I don't promote one particular diet on my BLOG.
 
There are particular guidelines that you can follow for healthy eating but at the end of the day, you have to find what works for you, and that means experimenting... trying different things and then see how you feel. 

Different people can eat different diets and still be healthy. 

There's really no one magic way to do it. 

13: meal planning is one of the keys to consistent healthy eating. 


I have noticed that when I plan my meals and I go grocery shopping accordingly I'm able to stick to a healthy diet consistently and when I don't plan my meals.. things go a little haywire. 

So if you're struggling with staying consistently eating well try to meal plan. 

I would love to share my process for meal planning but I feel like I haven't ironed out the kinks.

Once I've ironed out the kinks, then I'll let you know what I do.

14: solitude is transformative. 


Now I speak from the perspective of an introvert. 

I think for an introvert solitude is really important but I think it's important for everybody. 

It's such a great way to just connect with yourself, your ideas, introspect, spark creativity... all sorts of good things. 

I have found that when I don't get enough solitude, I am a different person.I'm not productive... I am NOT happy... I am NOT myself. 

I need that solitude to function well... to function at my optimal levels and if you don't get enough solitude and never tried it, consider trying it out. 

15: your individual actions can collectively create a big change. 


I'm going to explain this with an example. 

So let's say you do something every single day for the environment.It's something small... maybe you recycle something. 

You might think that that one action of yours is sort of meaningless in the grand scheme of things because it's such a small action, but that's not true. 

People like you are also making the same change. 

If millions of us make the change that you're doing every day, then that is collectively a really, really big change.

So never feel that your actions... anything that you're doing for positive change is meaningless. It's not when we add up what everyone around the world is doing. 

It really is a lot, so try to make sure that you're doing something... something small.Even if it's the tiniest thing every day to help the environment. 

society, whatever it may be. Every action counts. 

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